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The Discreet Posts of the Bourgeoisie
- Chandler’s Trailers: “The Alphabet Murders” (1965)
- Chandler’s Trailers: “The Card Counter” (2021)
- Chandler’s Trailers: “The Hound of the Baskervilles” (1978)
- Suspicious Minds: “Elvis” (2022)
- Dear Cinema Santa: 2022 Edition
- “There Ain’t No Sanity Clause”: Classic Film Images Photo Quiz, Dec. 2022 Edition, Vol. 12.25
- Untrue Confessions: “Witchfinder General” (1968)
- Concession Stand Bites: “Belfast” (2021)
- Vacancy: “Hotel” (1967)
- Haven’t We Killed Here Before?: “The Formula” (1980)
- Railroaded: “Fool’s Parade” (1971)
- TCM’s Chicken or Egg Conundrum
- Chandler’s Trailers: “The Batman” (2022)
- Boom and Boom Again: “The Suicide Squad” (2021)
- Concession Stand Bites: “The Legend of the Lone Ranger” (1981)
- Bats: Classic Film Images Photo Quiz, July 2022 Edition, Vol. 9
- Entropy Is What It Used To Be: “Tenet” (2020)
- Blood and Sand: “The Longest Day” (1962)
- Barred: Classic Film Photo Quiz, June 2022 Edition, Vol. 25 – Life
- Eye of the Needle: Classic Film Images Photo Quiz, April 2022 Edition, Vol. 60
- Repeating Trifle: “Comanche Territory” (1950)
- When Your Fingers Did the Walking: Classic Film Images Photo Quiz, March 2022 Edition, Vol. 411
- Slippery Slopes: Classic Film Images Photo Quiz, Feb. 2022 Edition, Vol. -10
- Whiskers: Classic Film Images Photo Quiz, Jan. 2022 Edition, Vol. 9
- Have I Got A Girl For You: Classic Film Images Photo Quiz, Dec. 2021 Edition, Vol. 35mm
- Smoke Gets In Your Eyes: Classic Film Image Photo Quiz, Nov. 2021 Edition, Vol. 3000
- Pedalers: Classic Film Images Photo Quiz, Oct. 2021 Edition, Vol. 400.6
- They Had Lenses Then: Classic Film Images Photo Quiz, Sept. 2021 Edition, Vol. 35mm
- Exeunt, Joan: “Trog” (1970)
- They Shoot Bad Movies Don’t They?: Classic Film Images Photo Quiz, Aug. 2021 Edition, Vol. 35MM
- …On Gossamer Wings: Classic Film Images Photo Quiz, July 2021 Edition, Vol. 0G
- Swamp Thang: “‘Gator Bait” (1974)
- Blood and Sand: “The Longest Day” (1962)
- Memorium: Classic Film Images Photo Quiz, July 2021 Edition, Vol. 6
- Horse Sense: Classic Film Images Photo Quiz, May 2021 Edition, Vol. 6 Hands
- Without a Clue: “The Stone Killer” (1973)
- Strange Bedfellows: “Public Affairs” (1983)
- Isn’t Running a Sign You’re Up to No-Good?: Classic Film Images Photo Quiz, Apr. 2021 Edition, Vol. 26.2
- All Creatures Great and Small: Classic Film Images Photo Quiz, March 2021 Edition, Vol. 46XXL
- In the Realm of the Insensible: “Jade” (1995)
- Jungle Daze: “Trader Horn” (1973)
- Lurching: “The Addams Family” (2019)
- Noir!: Classic Film Images Photo Quiz, Feb. 2021 Edition, Vol. .38
- Thundering Cliff Notes: “Tombstone” (1993)
- Riding Off Into the Rising Sunset: “Red Sun” (1971)
- Lucky 2021: Classic Film Images Photo Quiz, Jan. 2021 Edition, Vol. 0-0
- Getting Crabs: “Attack of the Crab Monsters” (1957)
- Black and White in Color: “In the Heat of the Night” (1967)
- Castle Redux: “Two on a Guillotine” (1965)
- Heart of Darkness: “Justice League” (2017)
“They! They!”
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A review of Tim Burton's SF satire "MARS ATTACKS!" starring Jack Nicholson, Rod Steiger, Martin Short, Jim Brown and Lisa Marie.
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THE SEEKING OF WISDOM
FILMS DEMANDING REDISCOVERY:
Michelangelo Antonioni's neglected "Identificazione di una donna" relinquishes the metaphysical mire which had plagued the director for over a decade, and offered an introspective view of life, creation, sex and love. A film worthy of attention and serious reappraisal.
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Converting Populist Stooges Into Critical Thinkers In The Blink Of An Eye!
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The essential 1967 Russian film "Viy" was actually the first horror film produced in the Soviet regime.
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LEGAL THREATS & BOSSY MUMBO JUMBO
All material displayed is protected under copyright 2011 by Chandler Swain, Chandler Swain Reviews and parent companies therefore and whatnot. No material will be copied without the written permission of above parties unless the offender wishes to suffer a cruel fate worse than any experienced by a spouse of any reality program housewife, skank or pseudo-trash celebrity. Thou hast been warned. Just kidding.RECOMMENDED SOUNDTRACKS
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FEARLESS LEADER
THE CRITICAL ESTABLISHMENT : AN INTRODUCTION
What is it we seek from the Cinema? It all depends on your point of view.
For some, the movies are a source of seeking refuge from everyday existence, a release from daily tensions and anxieties. This is escapism and it has been the driving factor of the Populist attraction to the movies since the origin of the form. However, if one were to alter the view and regard film without merely the Populist limitations of escapist diversion but also as an Art Form, the perspective deepens and enters the realm of Critical Thought.
Though inconsistent in perspective, each side has validity, and is actually far more dependent on the existence of the other than would first seem possible. In a nutshell, it is a battleground between perceived verisimilitude against the aesthetic Ideal.
In formulating the foundations of The Critical Establishment,
it is necessary to understand the characteristics of each perspective, to note the seemingly contradictory similarities and disparities, and their often inextricable interconnections.THE CRITICAL ESTABLISHMENT : The Reviewer as Vox Populi
In examining both Populist thought and Critical Thinking in Film, it is useful to define the key players in the field: the reviewers and the critics. Though seemingly cut from the same cloth, there is a world of difference. Reviewers are the professional manifestation of the Populist front; reviewers have a primary focus on entertainment value while critics evaluate under an aesthetic criteria, reviewers reward immediate gratification whereas critics seek artistry.
With the burgeoning of internet filmspeak, there is a misconception that the old model of printed press criticism is being eroded by the emergence of an equal internet critical roster. This, however, is a fallacy. One thing is for certain, even with a cursory glance at popular internet movie sites: reviewers are plentiful and genuine criticism of merit is as scarce as water in the Mojave Desert.
The reviewer will generally spend the bulk of their time reprinting the plot synopsis of a film, often almost verbatim from the printed materials of the studio. While this assists handily in filling a column, it does little to illuminate the worth of a film. The reviewer will often spend an inordinate amount of time relaying such unessential data as background gossip, "best" lists and an alarming volume of space on film finances- usually relating to either the film's budget (as if the writer had a financial stake in the enterprise) or opening weekend receipts, neither of which has the slightest bearing on the film's aesthetic achievement.
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- Matinees at the Franklin Cinema
- Momento Mori
- Multiplex Movies
- NIGHTS AT THE ASPEN HILL CINEMA
- NIGHTS AT THE CINEMA 733
- Nights at the Coolidge Corner Theatre
- Nights at the KB Cinemas
- Nights at the Langley Theater
- Nights at the Laurel Drive-In
- Nights at the Orson Welles Cinema
- Nights at the PARK SQUARE CINEMA
- Nights at the Roth Theaters
- Nights at the Sack Cinemas
- Nights at the Silver Theater
- NIGHTS AT THE ST. GEORGE THEATER
- Nights at the State Theater
- NIGHTS AT THE UPTOWN THEATER, WASHINGTON D.C.
- NIGHTS AT THE WHEATON PLAZA PLAYHOUSE
- NITES AT THE SHOPPERS WORLD CINEMA
- POSTS AND RECENT THINKINGS
- Poverty Row
- Remembrance of Films Forgotten
- Retired Puzzles
- Sexual Politics in the Cinema
- SHORT FILMS: The Other Cinema
- The Concession Stand III: Guns of the Quick Nibble Reviews
- THE FILM VAULT: INDEX OF REVIEWED FILMS
- Views From The Screening Room
- WELCOME TO THE WONDERFUL WORLD OF CINEMA
- Notes From The Critical Establishment
- NOW PLAYING AT THE MERCADO CINEMA
- THE MERCADO LOUNGE: a rest stop for the Critical Mind
- The Hollywood Bookshelf
- CHANDLER SWAIN REVIEWS: NITES AT THE DRIVE-IN CINEMA
- The Concession Stand: Quick Nibble Reviews
- CHANDLER SWAIN REVIEWS: ART HOUSE CINEMA
- Chandler Swain Reviews: The Silents
- Sticky Floors, Stained Screens: Days & Nights at The Grindhouse
Category Archives: sex
Strange Bedfellows: “Public Affairs” (1983)
“Public Affairs” (1983) Henri Pachard’s “Public Affairs” (which he also co-scripted) would have you believe that politics is no deeper than a lowbrow humor which seems suspiciously lifted using the frivolous filter of vague remembrance … Continue reading
In the Realm of the Insensible: “Jade” (1995)
“Jade” (1995) While convolution in a murder mystery is nothing new, a film usually pays dividends if, in the end, a semblance of coherence can be deciphered from even the most labyrinthine of … Continue reading
What the Peeper Saw: “What Do You Say to a Naked Lady?” (1970)
“What Do You Say to a Naked Lady?” (1970) Alan Funt’s “What Do You Say to a Naked Lady?” begins with the noted television Peeping Tom/provocateur fiddling with his surveillance equipment … Continue reading
Diplomatic Affairs: “Die lady” (1964)
“Die lady” (1964) Starring Ingrid Thulin, Paul Hubschmid, Nikos Kourkoulos, Claudine Auger, Bernard Verley. Written by Peter Berneis. Directed by Han Albin & Peter Berneis. (aka “Games of Desire”) Ingrid Thulin stars as Nadine, the trophy wife to Elliot, a secretly … Continue reading
Curiouser and Curiouser: “The Curious Female” (1970)
“The Curious Female” (1970) One might be sympathetic to the exploitation filmmaker who deems that gratuitous sex and nudity alone is insufficient to realize any but the most base of creative intentions and … Continue reading
Undercovers: “The Ganja Express” (1978)
“The Ganja Express” (1978) Three men pretending to be actors play at being Federal agents who manage to confuse the most fundamental of plans: that is to say they are planning to pursue a drug … Continue reading
Performance Anxiety: “A Labor of Love” (1976)
“A Labor of Love” (1976) In the early 1970s, with the emergence of Porno Chic as a passport for the average moviegoer to casually experience that which heretofore had been the patron territory of the … Continue reading
Touch and Go: “He & She” (1970)
“He & She” (1970) Matt Cimber’s “He & She” is one of those cannily marketed pseudo-explicit features which skated by the diligently suspicious antennae of community standards by masquerading its exploitative intentions as an educationally … Continue reading
Variety is the Spice of Life: Classic Film Images Photo Quiz, June 2019 Edition, Vol. 57
Variety is the Spice of Life: Classic Film Images Photo Quiz, June 2019 Edition, Vol. 57 In keeping with the CSR tradition of taking an entire month to upgrade, update and perform a much needed Spring Cleaning on the … Continue reading
Chandler’s Trailers: “Foreplay” (1975)
“Foreplay” (1975) Considering the drastic flux occurring in the American cinema commensurate with both the so-called Sexual Revolution (which with the concurrent rise of the radical Women’s Lib movement made for some interesting paralyzing debates between the assertion of sexual freedom … Continue reading
Splits: “The Cheerleaders” (1973)
“The Cheerleaders” (1973) With “The Cheerleaders”, director Paul Glickler answers the musical question: just what goes on in the heads of America’s annoying sideline screamers? If his film is any accurate indication, the answer is simple: … Continue reading
Chandler’s Trailers: “The Life and Times of Xaviera Hollander” (1974)
“The Life and Times of Xaviera Hollander” (1974) Disregarding the content of the real-life Hollander’s memoirs ‘The Happy Hooker’, Larry G. Spangler’s film is merely an extremely crude patchwork of lackluster sex scenes framed as flashbacks as a fictitious rendition … Continue reading
Chandler’s Trailers: “Sex By Advertisement” (1968)
“Sex By Advertisement” (1968) Is it a mockumentary on the subject of “degenerate” sex, or simply another sleazy sexploitation film pretending to have social significance in order to elude prosecution? A little of both actually, though the former may be … Continue reading
Nakedly Revealing: “Oh! Calcutta!” (1972)
` “Oh! Calcutta!” (1972) “In America, sex is an obsession. In other parts of the world, it’s a fact.” … Continue reading
Chandler’s Trailers: “Four Dimensions of Greta” (1972)
“Four Dimensions of Greta” (1972) Never at a loss for a gimmick to lure unsuspecting patrons to fill seats, the 3-D craze arrived on the shores of England about two decades late with “Four Dimensions of Greta”, a film that … Continue reading
Ballot Stuffing: “Linda Lovelace for President” (1975)
“Linda Lovelace for President” (1975) Chances are that if a movie announces upfront that it intends to offend every member of the audience, the results will be fairly pedestrian, as a truly provocative … Continue reading
Chandler’s Trailers: “Zeta One” (1969)
“Zeta One” (1969) Presumably intended as a spoof of spoofs of the Eurospy film, “Zeta One” is little more than a succession of baffling, tedious scenes whose only connection is the desire to undrape the dozens of shapely actresses who … Continue reading
Ho Ho Ho: Classic Film Images Photo Quiz, Dec 2018 Edition, Vol. $50hr
Ho Ho Ho: Classic Film Images Photo Quiz, Dec. 2018 Edition, Vol. $50hr If not the oldest profession, it certainly would counted high on the list of most depicted professions on the silver screen. We are, of course, … Continue reading
Empty Space: “Space Thing” (1968)
“Space Thing” (1968) The most meritoriously insignificant of films, surely among which Byron Mabe’s “Space Thing” may be unhesitatingly included, may often offer themselves up as the bearers of small life lessons concerning the creative … Continue reading
Down the Hatch: “Deep Throat” (1972)
“Deep Throat“ (1972) The only remotely interesting aspect of Gerard Damiano’s “Deep Throat” is that the film which is credited with the popular launching of the so-called era of “Porno Chic” and, with it, the … Continue reading
The Feminine Mystique: “I Want What I Want” (1972)
“I Want What I Want” (1972) A young man hesitatingly sneaks looks at peeks as pretty girls as they pass by, with an uncomfortable longing that will turn out to have less to do with … Continue reading
Vacancies: “Common-Law Cabin” (1967)
“Common-Law Cabin” (1967) “Common-Law Cabin” is a white trash comedy concerning the denizens of a dilapidated ranch cum tourist attraction on the Colorado River. The film begins like an … Continue reading
Roughage: “Bad Girls Go to Hell” (1965)
“Bad Girls Go to Hell” (1965) Crossing the perilous chasm that separates the blasé nudie and the realm of the deliberately provocative roughie, director Doris Wishman appears to delve into the … Continue reading
Sleeping Around: “Submission” (1969)
“Submission” (1969) Audiences seeking erotic satisfaction solely for its own sake could do worse than Allen Savage’s obscure but bizarre softcore effort “Submission”; and this is only considering that … Continue reading
Soulless: “Ilsa, She Wolf of the SS” (1975)
“Ilsa, She Wolf of the SS” (1975) If history doesn’t present us with enough examples of inhuman atrocity, leave it to the movie industry to feel compelled to invent a peculiar hybrid combining the … Continue reading
Mother Knows Best: “Career Bed” (1969)
“Career Bed” (1969) “Don’t give up your virginity for some silly boy, it’s too important an asset.” With motherly advice like this is it any wonder … Continue reading
Internal Obsession: “Love” (2015)
Internal Obsession: “Love” (2015) “Love” is Gaspar Noé’s least controversial and most emotionally accessible film to date; an astonishing statement when one considers that the film is liberally packed with scenes … Continue reading
Tryst and Shout: “The Canyons” (2013)
Tryst and Shout: “The Canyons” (2013) Paul Schrader may not sympathize with his characters, but he certainly enjoys their discomfort. Were he to attempt a screwball comedy, it would no doubt result in an invocation … Continue reading
Slab Happy: “El cadáver de Anna Fritz” (2015)
Slab Happy: “El cadáver de Anna Fritz” (2015) One need only glance at the sorry offerings on the local multiplex marquee to see that the commercial cinema is in a state of crisis. It is … Continue reading
Scorched: “Suntan” (2016)
Scorched: “Suntan” (2016) A caveat: the following review may hint at details distressing to viewers who wish to experience a completely fresh viewing of the film. Argyris Papadimitropoulos’ “Suntan” follows the disastrous trajectory of … Continue reading
Revisit: Love Intestinal-Style: “Andy Warhol’s Frankenstein” (1974)
“Andy Warhol’s Frankenstein” (1974) (Originally posted on April 18, 2013) Filmed immediately prior to “Andy Warhol’s Dracula”, more popularly known as “Blood For Dracula”, Paul Morrissey’s “Andy Warhol’s Frankenstein”, filmed under and later re-released under the title “Flesh For … Continue reading
Working Girl: “The Flesh is Weak” (1957)
“The Flesh is Weak” (1957) As if the film’s suggestively salacious title weren’t clue enough, if there were any doubt as to the direction to be taken by Don Chaffey’s “The Flesh is … Continue reading
Stolen Kisses: The Birth of Adult Cinema
The Birth of Adult Cinema: “The Kiss” / “Après le bal” (1896/1897) “I shall not today attempt further to define the kinds of material I understand to be embraced within that shorthand description [“hard-core pornography”] as I … Continue reading
The First Time is Not the Charm: “Bolero” (1984)
“Bolero” (1984) Has there ever been a more overwrought, exhibitionistic vaudeville designed to celebrate the loss of virginity than John Derek’s 1984 potboiler “Bolero”? Concurrent with the actor cum writer/director’s other … Continue reading
Unbalanced: “La bestia uccide a sangue freddo” (1971)
“La bestia uccide a sangue freddo” (1971) “What else have you done? You moved the body and took away the weapon. Then you called the police, asking me to come immediately … Continue reading
Dear Cinema Santa: 2017 Edition
Dear Cinema Santa: 2017 Edition Light up boys and girls and all of the ships at sea, for once again we’ve arrived at that time of the year in which the bonds of a year filled … Continue reading
Adrift: “Fidelio, l’odyssée d’Alice” (2014)
“Fidelio, l’odyssée d’Alice” (2014) Fidelity has long been used as a thematic excuse for Hollywood excursions into cheap eroticism, using the subject as an excuse for glossy portraits of high profile versions of Joe Sarno films … Continue reading
Passion Play: “Matinee” (2009)
“MATINÉE” (2009) A man and a woman encounter each other on a mattress and engage in heated coital action until reaching mutual satisfaction. With the exception of an equality emphasized in … Continue reading
Cesspool: “Whirlpool” (1970)
“WHIRLPOOL” (1970) “Protracted” isn’t often the first word that comes to mind when think of film thrillers, especially of the psycho-sexual variety, but a flexible vocabulary certainly comes in handy when talking about José Ramón Larraz’ directorial debut … Continue reading
What a Dip: Classic Film Images Photo Quiz, August 2017 Edition, Vol. H2O
What a Dip: Classic Film Images Photo Quiz, August 2017 Edition, Vol. H2O During the current climate in which it seems many who should know better, by all appearances, are all wet, allow us to present this month’s … Continue reading
Duh is the New Sexy: “About Cherry” (2012)
__________________________________________________________ “About Cherry” (2012) In days of old, the pastor, priest or conveniently situated village moral wag would extend the quivering finger of damnation at those to whom the communal boundaries of decency were found to … Continue reading
Smeared: “Lipstick” (1976)
“LIPSTICK” (1976) What is it about certain truly bad movies and their ability to provoke heated (as opposed to passionate) and angry (as opposed to intelligent) argumentation (as opposed to debate) in a way that few exceptional films lend … Continue reading
Why Can’t a Woman Be More Like a Man?: Classic film Photo Quiz, Sept. 2016 Edition; Vol. 362436
Why Can’t a Woman Be More Like a Man?: Classic Film Photo Quiz, Sept. 2016 Edition, Vol. 362436 If the events of the recent political season have taught us anything, it’s that women have achieved a true equality … Continue reading
Kitty Litter: “Confessions of a Psycho Cat” (1968)
“Confessions of a Psycho Cat” (1968) While the variety of adaptations of Richard Connell’s seminal short story The Most Dangerous Game is impressively eclectic- with the tale attracting cinematic interest from filmmakers on both ends … Continue reading
Garters, Glitter and Gauze: “The Rocky Horror Picture Show” (1975)
“The Rocky Horror Picture Show” (1975) Frank N. Stein: There’s no crime in giving yourself over to pleasure. Audience Response (Boston): There is in Massachusetts. Long a staple of the disappearing urban … Continue reading
La beauté du monde: Classic Film Images Quiz, August 2015 Edition, Vol. 36-24-36
La beauté du monde: Film Images Quiz, August 2015 Edition, Vol. 36-24-36 Welcome all purveyors of cinematic curiosity to yet another edition of America’s most pointless monthly game, and a source of possible future litigation by the National Organization … Continue reading
Soft at the Core: “Emmanuelle” (1974)
In the world of cinema sex, Just Jaeckin’s 1974 film “Emmanuelle” holds a rather special position between the then newly popularized concept of “porno chic” and the continuing exploration of sexual politics within the framework of the artistically … Continue reading
Carnivale Sexualis: “A Thousand Pleasures” (1968)
In the domain of the Cinema of the Strange, director-actor Michael Findlay, under his alias Julian Marsh, certainly occupies a prominent corner of the far end of the darkened foyer, as demonstrated by his incomprehensible killer/lesbian/infantilism opus “A Thousand … Continue reading