Author Archives: chandlerswainreviews

About chandlerswainreviews

I've been a puppet, a pirate, a pauper, a poet, a pawn and a king, not necessarily in that order. My first major movie memory was being at the drive-in at about 1 1/2 yrs. old seeing "Sayonara" so I suppose an interest in film was inevitable. (For those scoring at home- good for you- I wasn't driving that evening, so no need to alert authorities.)Writer, critic and confessed spoiler of women, as I have a tendency to forget to put them back in the refrigerator. My apologies.

Chandler’s Trailers: “The Hound of the Baskervilles” (1978)

“Hound of the Baskervilles, The” (1978) Anyone who has seen any film directed by Paul Morrissey under the weighty umbrella of Warhol should not be surprised that the director’s initial foray into studio comedy would be inhibited by a similar … Continue reading

Posted in books, British films, comedy, Movies, Mystery, Spike Milligan, Terry-Thomas, writing | 1 Comment

Suspicious Minds: “Elvis” (2022)

     “Elvis”  (2022)       Is it possible to know even less about a prominent cultural icon after viewing a major motion picture about them than before seeing that film? This is one of the lingering problems with … Continue reading

Posted in Movies, Musicals, music, writing, biography, Elvis Presley, Austin Butler, Tom Hanks, Baz Luhrmann | 1 Comment

Dear Cinema Santa: 2022 Edition

Dear Cinema Santa: 2022 Edition ‘Tis the time of year when Hollywood winds down into its shameless baiting for award season recognition with the latest slate of feel-good holiday slasher films, scatalogical comedies and finger-wagging agenda dramas aimed at deflating … Continue reading

Posted in Entertainment, Culture, Movies, movie reviews, Film, Boston, writing, holidays, blogs | Leave a comment

“There Ain’t No Sanity Clause”: Classic Film Images Photo Quiz, Dec. 2022 Edition, Vol. 12.25

“There Ain’t No Sanity Clause”: Classic Film Images Photo Quiz, Dec. 2022 Edition, Vol. 12.25      With all due deference to Chico Marx, with the approach of that most irresistible season of blind avarice, it is incumbent on that deservedly … Continue reading

Posted in biography, books, Boston, Christmas, comedy, Culture, Entertainment, fantasy, holidays, Movies, photography, Puzzles, Santa Claus, writing | 7 Comments

Untrue Confessions: “Witchfinder General” (1968)

           “Witchfinder General”  (1968)     Whenever the subject arises as to the hows and whys relating the attraction and obedient acclimation to the rise of unhealthy societal extremes such as Nazism, it might be useful … Continue reading

Posted in books, Drive-In Movies, History, Movies, vincent price, writing | Tagged , , | 6 Comments

Concession Stand Bites: “Belfast” (2021)

“Belfast” (2021) Starring Jamie Dornan, Jude Hill, Caitriona Balfe, Judi Dench, Ciarán Hinds. Written and directed by Kenneth Branagh.  It is inescapable to view Kenneth Branagh’s “Belfast” without recognizing that this current King of Unnecessary Remakes is attempting his Irish … Continue reading

Posted in John Boorman, Judi Dench, Kenneth Branagh, Movies, writing | Tagged , , | 2 Comments

Vacancy: “Hotel” (1967)

       “HOTEL”    (1967)     While reading Arthur Hailey’s novel “Hotel” (a beach book version of “Grand Hotel”), one gets a similar sensation to that of working on a disappointing jigsaw puzzle: at certain moments in working … Continue reading

Posted in books, Karl Malden, movie reviews, Movies, racism, Rod Taylor, Romance, writing | Tagged , , | 2 Comments

Haven’t We Killed Here Before?: “The Formula” (1980)

    “THE FORMULA”  (1980)    Perhaps the most interesting point of discussion regarding John G. Avildsen’s film “The Formula” is the irony of its presumably unintentionally honest title. If there has been in recent memory a big studio release thriller … Continue reading

Posted in books, George C. Scott, Marlon Brando, Marthe Keller, movie reviews, Movies, Mystery, World War II, writing | Tagged , , | 1 Comment

Railroaded: “Fool’s Parade” (1971)

     “Fool’s Parade”  (1971)     “Fool’s Parade” is one of those occasional excursions into what a jaded America film industry would regard (no doubt with pinched nostrils) as the “heartland”; a rural conception entirely alien to a self-indulgent cultural … Continue reading

Posted in books, George Kennedy, James Stewart, Movies, writing | Tagged , , , , | 1 Comment

TCM’s Chicken or Egg Conundrum

   In the 1974 film “Chinatown”, a gleefully corrupt Noah Cross sagely observes: “Politicians, ugly buildings and whores all get respectable with age”.  Add bad movies to that short list and he might have had something there.     Periodically, … Continue reading

Posted in cinema, Culture, Movies, TCM | Tagged , | 1 Comment

Chandler’s Trailers: “The Batman” (2022)

“Batman, The” (2022) Overlong, needlessly murky (both visually and narratively) and prone to a pretension that its concession to the most predictable standards of the genre fails to merit, “The Batman” is the umpteenth origin story of the Caped crusader; … Continue reading

Posted in comic books, crime, Culture, Movies | Tagged , | 3 Comments

Boom and Boom Again: “The Suicide Squad” (2021)

          “The Suicide Squad”  (2021)     The first overt merging of deliberate trashy Troma aesthetics with big studio mega-budgeted inevitably trashy content. If there is a confusing similarity to a previous DC Comics-sourced vehicle from … Continue reading

Posted in comic books, crime, fantasy, Idris Elba, Margot Robbie, Movies | 1 Comment

Concession Stand Bites: “The Legend of the Lone Ranger” (1981)

“The Legend of the Lone Ranger ” (1981)  Starring Klinton Spilsbury, Michael Horse, Juanin Clay,  Jason Robards, Matt Clark, Christopher Lloyd. Directed by William A. Fraker. Written by Ivan Goff, Ben Roberts, Wiliam Roberts, Michael Kane & Jerry Derioshon. If one … Continue reading

Posted in movie reviews, Movies, Reviews, Sam Peckinpah, Television, westerns, writing | Tagged , , , | 1 Comment

Bats: Classic Film Images Photo Quiz, July 2022 Edition, Vol. 9

Bats: Classic Film Images Photo Quiz, July 2022 Edition, Vol. 9      Surrounded by an unceasing parade of bloodsuckers in human form (y’know, politicians. media -ahem- journalists, phony social activists and lawyers… a veritable Hellzapoppin’ of deceit, deception and … Continue reading

Posted in animation, books, Boston, crime, Drive-In Movies, horror, Movies, Mystery, photography, silent movies, vampires, women, writing | 2 Comments

Entropy Is What It Used To Be: “Tenet” (2020)

       “TENET”   (2020)     Christopher Nolan’s time circuitous action drama “Tenet” has been elevated in critical evaluation due in no small part to a reliance on the assertion that the film’s labyrinthine plotting is frustrating to any comprehensive … Continue reading

Posted in espionage, Eurospy movies, Kenneth Branagh, Michael Caine, Movies, Mystery, science fiction | Tagged , | 2 Comments

Blood and Sand: “The Longest Day” (1962)

Originally posted on CHANDLER SWAIN REVIEWS:
    Darryl F. Zanuck’s monumental war epic depicting the events of the D-Day invasion of World War 2 has the disadvantage of not only following dozens of characters over dozens of different locations,…

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Barred: Classic Film Photo Quiz, June 2022 Edition, Vol. 25 – Life

Barred: Classic Film Images Photo Quiz, June 2022 Edition, Vol. 25 – Life Let us commemorate that happy time of the year when the children of this nation (a.k.a. deadbeats) are about to be released from their grueling three weeks of … Continue reading

Posted in Mai Zetterling., Movies, silent movies, women, writing | Tagged , , , | 1 Comment

Eye of the Needle: Classic Film Images Photo Quiz, April 2022 Edition, Vol. 60

Eye of the Needle: Classic Film Images Photo Quiz, April 2022 Edition, Vol. 60 You are invited to a very special edition (not really) of this belated edition of the Classic Film Images Photo Quiz in which we celebrate a very … Continue reading

Posted in biography, black cinema, books, Boston, Drive-In Movies, Elvis Presley, Movies, Musicals, Romance, theater, women, writing | Tagged , , | 2 Comments

Repeating Trifle: “Comanche Territory” (1950)

“Comanche Territory” (1950)      This fictionalized story (even more than is usual for the historical fantasists of Hollywood) of a pre-Alamo frontier adventure featuring legendary Texan Jim Bowie (Macdonald Carey) concerns a territorial dispute by ruthless speculators simmering over silver … Continue reading

Posted in Macdonald Carey, Maureen O'Hara, Movies, westerns, women, writing | Tagged , , | 2 Comments

When Your Fingers Did the Walking: Classic Film Images Photo Quiz, March 2022 Edition, Vol. 411

When Your Fingers Did the Walking: Classic Film Images Photo Quiz, March 2022 Edition, Vol. 411      In a world in desperate need of all of the humor one can muster, it never fails to entertain to seek out a … Continue reading

Posted in Cold War, comedy, crime, Drive-In Movies, History, Movies, Musicals, Mystery, photography, Romance, women, writing | 3 Comments

Slippery Slopes: Classic Film Images Photo Quiz, Feb. 2022 Edition, Vol. -10

Slippery Slopes: Classic Film Images Photo Quiz, Feb. 2022 Edition, Vol. -10     As the world blithely careens down the precipice of vaudevillian burlesque, led by that old tried and true tacky combination of a cranky baggy pants straight … Continue reading

Posted in biography, books, crime, Drive-In Movies, Movies, Musicals, photography, Romance, war movies, women, writing | 2 Comments

Whiskers: Classic Film Images Photo Quiz, Jan. 2022 Edition, Vol. 9

Whiskers: Classic Film Images Photo Quiz, Jan. 2022 Edition, Vol. 9 Celebrating a new year with style and grace (and not a little bit of sartorial elegance), we proudly announce a new year and, thus, a new age of CSR; one … Continue reading

Posted in animation, biography, books, Boston, comedy, History, Movies, photography, writing | 2 Comments

Have I Got A Girl For You: Classic Film Images Photo Quiz, Dec. 2021 Edition, Vol. 35mm

Have I  Got A Girl For You: Classic Film Images Photo Quiz, Dec. 2021 Edition, Vol. 35mm    ‘Tis the season for gift giving and avaricious wishful thinking and while the members of the militant pseudo-feminist movement (“Declare your independence, then … Continue reading

Posted in art house cinema, black cinema, books, History, horror, Movies, Mystery, Romance, women | Tagged , , | 1 Comment

Smoke Gets In Your Eyes: Classic Film Image Photo Quiz, Nov. 2021 Edition, Vol. 3000

Smoke Gets In Your Eyes: Classic Film Images Photo Quiz, Nov. 2021 Edition, Vol. 3000 At a time when it seems that every authoritarian agency, whether governmental or private (with the line between the two often obscure or nonexistent), of … Continue reading

Posted in animation, art house cinema, biography, books, Boston, crime, Drive-In Movies, Movies, Mystery, women, writing | 4 Comments

Pedalers: Classic Film Images Photo Quiz, Oct. 2021 Edition, Vol. 400.6

PEDALERS:  CLASSIC FILM IMAGES PHOTO QUIZ, OCT. 2021 EDITION, VOL. 400.6     In deference to the assertions of those who derive from great glee from splashing rain puddles onto the sidewalk strolling CSR editorial staff as they zoom by in … Continue reading

Posted in biography, books, Boston, Drive-In Movies, Italian cinema, Movies, photography, Romance, war movies, women, writing | 2 Comments

They Had Lenses Then: Classic Film Images Photo Quiz, Sept. 2021 Edition, Vol. 35mm

They Had Lenses Then: Classic Film Images Photo Quiz, Sept. 2021 Edition, Vol. 35mm Eschewing the usual mockery of political and social buffoons in the course of shamelessly circuitous introduction, current events demand that a passing dismissal of the criminally … Continue reading

Posted in Audie Murphy, biography, books, Boston, Drive-In Movies, History, Mimsy Farmer, Musicals, politics, Romance, women, writing | 2 Comments

Exeunt, Joan: “Trog” (1970)

      “Trog”  (1970)      When a trio of amateur spelunkers accidentally discover and unleash a living and frisky missing link from a shallow cave, naturally the interest of the world scientific community becomes secondary to the interests of … Continue reading

Posted in British films, Drive-In Movies, Freddie Francis, horror, Joan Crawford, Michael Gough, Movies, writing | 1 Comment

They Shoot Bad Movies Don’t They?: Classic Film Images Photo Quiz, Aug. 2021 Edition, Vol. 35MM

They Shoot Bad Movies Don’t They?: Classic Film Images Photo Quiz, Aug. 2021 Edition, Vol. 35MM    Despite Chairman Xi’s 2019 Xmas gift to the civilized world (and Vermont) in the form of a mildly annoying pandemic which not only … Continue reading

Posted in Andy Warhol, biography, books, Boston, comedy, Drive-In Movies, football, germ warfare, Ingrid Thulin, Jenny Agutter, Movies, music, religion | 3 Comments

…On Gossamer Wings: Classic Film Images Photo Quiz, July 2021 Edition, Vol. 0G

…On Gossamer Wings: Classic Film Images Photo Quiz, July 2021 Edition, Vol. 0G     With the current interest is privatized space travel capturing the popular imagination, and providing a welcome distraction and yet another promising one-way ticket out of … Continue reading

Posted in books, Drive-In Movies, George Pal, Movies, photography, science, science fiction, writing | 3 Comments

Swamp Thang: “‘Gator Bait” (1974)

          “‘Gator Bait”  (1974)     “‘Gator Bait” is a simplistic tale of revenge that is simply told, entirely lacking in any trace of nuance or pretensions toward Art and it’s all the better for it. … Continue reading

Posted in crime, Drive-In Movies, grindhouse, movie sequels, Movies, women, writing | Tagged | 1 Comment

Blood and Sand: “The Longest Day” (1962)

Originally posted on CHANDLER SWAIN REVIEWS:
     “The Longest Day”   (1962) (Originally published June 23, 2013)     Darryl F. Zanuck’s monumental war epic depicting the events of the D-Day invasion of World War 2 has the disadvantage of…

Posted in Movies | 1 Comment

Memorium: Classic Film Images Photo Quiz, July 2021 Edition, Vol. 6

Memorium: Classic Film Images Photo Quiz, June 2021 Edition, Vol. 6      In the aftermath of America’s annual amnesia as to the true meaning of Memorial Day aside from the now-popular three day bacchanal celebrated by those nursing that … Continue reading

Posted in Blaxploitation, books, Boston, horror, Movies, Mystery, photography, westerns, writing | 2 Comments

Horse Sense: Classic Film Images Photo Quiz, May 2021 Edition, Vol. 6 Hands

HORSE SENSE: CLASSIC FILM IMAGES PHOTO QUIZ, MAY 2021 EDITION, VOL. 6 HANDS      If the current pandemic teaches us anything (a supposition which for reasons only a scientific investigation the size of the Manhattan Project might begin to unravel … Continue reading

Posted in Africa, art house cinema, biography, books, Drive-In Movies, Movies, photography, Romance, westerns, women, writing | 3 Comments

Without a Clue: “The Stone Killer” (1973)

          “The Stone Killer”  (1973)      Discontent to assure audiences of a visceral thrill ride by the mere mention in the opening credits of Michael Winner assuming the directorial antics, “The Stone Killer” begins with … Continue reading

Posted in books, Charles Bronson, crime, Drive-In Movies, Movies, Mystery, writing | Tagged , | 1 Comment

Strange Bedfellows: “Public Affairs” (1983)

       “Public Affairs”  (1983)      Henri Pachard’s “Public Affairs” (which he also co-scripted) would have you believe that politics is no deeper than a lowbrow humor which seems suspiciously lifted using the frivolous filter of vague remembrance … Continue reading

Posted in Annette Haven, comedy, erotica, grindhouse, Movies, politics, sex, Sex in Cinema, women, writing | 1 Comment

Isn’t Running a Sign You’re Up to No-Good?: Classic Film Images Photo Quiz, Apr. 2021 Edition, Vol. 26.2

Isn’t Running a Sign You’re Up to No-Good?: Classic Film Images Photo Quiz, Apr. 2021 Edition, Vol. 26.2      With this year’s upcoming cancelled running of the Boston Marathon, there is little reason for the annual Patriot’s Day holiday … Continue reading

Posted in art house cinema, biography, books, Boston, British films, crime, Drive-In Movies, grindhouse, Movies, Mystery, politics, women, writing | 5 Comments

All Creatures Great and Small: Classic Film Images Photo Quiz, March 2021 Edition, Vol. 46XXL

All Creatures Great and Small:  Classic Film Images Photo Quiz, March 2021 Edition, Vol. 46XXL      With the arrival of a theatrical film award season celebrating the achievements of a year completely invisible of theatrical entertainment, it has become … Continue reading

Posted in animation, Bert I. Gordon, books, Boston, Drive-In Movies, horror, kaiju, Movies, Pre-Code Movies, science fiction, silent movies, writing | 5 Comments

In the Realm of the Insensible: “Jade” (1995)

            “Jade”  (1995)    While convolution in a murder mystery is nothing new, a film usually pays dividends if, in the end, a semblance of coherence can be deciphered from even the most labyrinthine of … Continue reading

Posted in crime, erotica, Movies, Mystery, sex, William Friedkin, writing | Tagged , , , | 1 Comment

Jungle Daze: “Trader Horn” (1973)

“TRADER HORN”  (1973)     The painfully optimistic marketing material announces that this remake of the 1931 African adventure “Trader Horn” is in the grand tradition of “King Solomon’s Mines” and “Mogambo”. For once we are presented with an example … Continue reading

Posted in Africa, biography, books, movie remakes, Movies, Rod Taylor, Romance, writing | Tagged , , | 2 Comments

Lurching: “The Addams Family” (2019)

“The Addams Family”  (2019)     If anyone is sincere in capturing the delicious, wickedly funny malevolence of the original Charles Addams cartoons, it would seem prudent to preserve the monochromatic design of the drawings. The new animated “The Addams … Continue reading

Posted in animation, cartoons, comedy, humor, movie reviews, Movies, writing | Tagged , , | 1 Comment

Noir!: Classic Film Images Photo Quiz, Feb. 2021 Edition, Vol. .38

Noir!: Classic Film Images Photo Quiz, Feb. 2021 Edition, Vol. .38      Being that February is Black History Month and the crew at CSR are noted for their sensitivity to the burning issues of the day, it was decided … Continue reading

Posted in blogs, books, crime, Drive-In Movies, film noir, Movies, Mystery, women, writing | Tagged | 2 Comments

Thundering Cliff Notes: “Tombstone” (1993)

         “Tombstone”  (1993)      In George Stevens’ film “Shane”, when excitable homesteader Frank Torrey (Elisha Cook Jr.) is gunned down by the enigmatic hired killer Jack Wilson (Jack Palance), the director deliberately amplified the volume of … Continue reading

Posted in biography, History, Movies, westerns, writing | Tagged , , , , | 2 Comments

Riding Off Into the Rising Sunset: “Red Sun” (1971)

         “Red Sun”  (1971)     With the emergence of the Spaghetti Western, the appearance of ethnically incongruent casts became more commonplace, especially in light of the Italian film industry’s habit of shooting films MOS. The capability … Continue reading

Posted in Movies, Sam Peckinpah, westerns, writing | Tagged , , , | 1 Comment

Lucky 2021: Classic Film Images Photo Quiz, Jan. 2021 Edition, Vol. 0-0

Lucky 2021: Classic Film Images Photo Quiz, Jan. 2021 Edition, Vol. 0-0      Thank goodness for the end of 2020. Not that we have anything to complain about here at the offices of CSR, but we’re so tired of listening … Continue reading

Posted in biography, blogs, books, comedy, Drive-In Movies, Movies, Puzzles, Rosalba Neri, theater, writing | 3 Comments

Getting Crabs: “Attack of the Crab Monsters” (1957)

       “Attack of the Crab Monsters”  (1957)     One of the immediate presumptions one can make when noting the presence of genre regular Russell Johnson in Roger Corman’s “Attack of the Crab Monsters” is that, as in … Continue reading

Posted in Drive-In Movies, horror, Movies, Roger Corman, science fiction, writing | Tagged , , | 2 Comments

Black and White in Color: “In the Heat of the Night” (1967)

     “In the Heat of the Night”  (1967)     With “In the Heat of the Night” director Norman Jewison breaches the unconscionable commercial wall of denial concerning racial injustice by way of silence (born entirely of an industry … Continue reading

Posted in black cinema, book reviews, books, movie reviews, Movies, Mystery, racism, Reviews, Rod Steiger, Sidney Poitier, writing | Tagged , , | 2 Comments

Castle Redux: “Two on a Guillotine” (1965)

        “Two on a Guillotine” (1965)           Clearly taking direction from the horror films of William Castle and employing vividly evident inspiration from his 1959 “House on Haunted Hill”, William Conrad’s “Two on a … Continue reading

Posted in Drive-In Movies, Movies, Mystery, Romance, writing | Tagged , , , | 1 Comment

Heart of Darkness: “Justice League” (2017)

                “Justice League”  (2017)      If “Justice League” proves anything it’s that any pretense of the inclusion of genuine human heart in the halting but expanding collection of high-powered missteps known as … Continue reading

Posted in comic books, fantasy, Movies | Tagged , , , | 1 Comment

Chandler’s Trailers: “The Undertaker and his Pals” (1966)

“Undertaker and His Pals, The”  (1966) A bizarre hybrid of a film which emerges as an extremely low-rent version of Harvey Kurtzman-like parody of the savage mock Southern Gothic sadism of Herschell Gordon Lewis. To boost the business of  the … Continue reading

Posted in comedy, Drive-In Movies, grindhouse cinema, horror, movie reviews, Movies | Tagged , , | 1 Comment

Pacific Overtures: “PT 109” (1963)

               “PT 109”  (1963)      Much can be determined from the character of a person by the substance of an autobiographical tome. In the case of “PT 109”, so much influence was exerted … Continue reading

Posted in biography, books, Boston, History, Movies, war movies, World War II, writing | Tagged , , | 2 Comments