Going to the Chapel: Classic Film Images Photo Quiz, Nov. 2019 Edition, Vol. XXXI
This month’s offering comes with the dual purpose of pointing out the intellectual deficiencies of our readers (glad to do it) and to seek sanctuary from the incessant clutter of Big Indeterminate Gender Sibling political finger wagging aimed at my climatically fatal carbon footprint brought on by my insensitive toasting an English Muffin for breakfast. (Damn that Neville Chamberlain for his influential incursion on American eating habits!), How was I to know that the mere act of heating something on which I might smear the red raspberry hemlock marmalade received as a gift from by a grateful CSR staff immediately following their annual performance reviews and subsequent denial of pay raises, might suddenly initiate a staggering chain of events involving a Congressional call to arms (though only after an FBI background check and seven day waiting period) that has brought to fruition something called the Greenback New Deal in which the nation would defer from an the economy dependent on oil, coal, beef and pleasure into a more environmentally responsible society based solely on hamster wheels, indentured servant drawn rickshaws, fiddleheads and a mass desire for suicide as an alternative to enduring the publication of yet another fabulist “memoir” by that eminent and perpetual sore loser Hillary Clinton (a political version of direct-to-video trash if ever there were one)? Which brings us to this month’s edition of America’s most theologically obtuse brain teaser the Classic Film Images Photo Quiz, brought to you this and every month by the distributors of SKITTLES, America’s favorite breakfast candy. In this edition we celebrate that time honored place offering sanctuary without the inconvenience of combative, smelly junkie homeless, fascist Antifa thugs and entitled illegal aliens: the church and its many manifestations in the cinema; be it an ever so humble chapel or a massive cathedral, the church has existed in film as a place of solace, comfort and the occasional fraternal hijinks. The following twenty five images represent activities taking place within church walls within the wall of the equally humble (with good reason) movie theatre (there’s that Brit influence again). Your task is to identify all twenty five films, and not merely to show off your mental prowess (yeah, right), but to obtain a shiny new copy of the CSR Culture Shock Award, which will be awarded to the first reader capable of solving this visual bit o’ toffee, Guv’Nah (what?). Good luck.
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